Preparing for Love Incarnate

Dear Friends,

I wish you a happy and blessed Advent, as we prepare our hearts and homes to welcome the gift of Jesus at Christmas!

Clever Saint Bernard describes, not one, but the “three comings” of Christ. Jesus comes “in history, in mystery and majesty.” Jesus arrives into the world on that fateful night in the cave outside Bethlehem; He comes into our lives now - especially through the Sacrament of the Eucharist; and He will come at the end of time to judge the world. Each arrival requires preparation, an open and willing heart, and a joyful spirit!

Let us just take a step back from the bustle before the season kicks into full swing. Try right now to reserve some time (box it out in your calendar) to pause and prepare your heart in silence for the arrival of Emmanuel (God-with-us).

We believe that God is Love (1 Jn 4:16). We hold that Jesus is the Son of God; He is the invisible God made visible for us. He comes close to us, embracing our humanity and showing us what God looks like, really what love looks like. Jesus is love made visible. So, we could say that Jesus’ arrival is that of Love Incarnate. Love personified. The mysterious and invisible God (who is love), made a bit less mysterious, a bit more tangible and concrete - someone we can lay our eyes and hands on. Jesus of Nazareth is someone who really relates to us and to whom we can relate. We have kinship, friendship, a bond of affection since in Christ Jesus, Love comes close, into our midst.

That is the logic behind our focus on Gary Chapman’s Love Languages for Advent. The Love Languages are five different ways we give and receive love. They are: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Gift Giving, and Physical Touch. The basic premise is that we give and receive love in different ways. Not all love is expressed with hugs and kisses. In fact, we each have preferred ways to communicate our love. This series is about learning to appreciate the different ways we show and receive love as we prepare for the arrival of Love made visible. We encourage you to check out one of Chapman’s books or take a short online quiz or here. These are not meant just “for lovers” but for anyone, however the fact that this effort began to help romantic couples enhance their relationships, does at times color the questions.

Love, like language, is a two-way street. There is giving and receiving, speaking, and listening. We need to be attentive to both directions in our appreciation of this wisdom. 

For me personally, I am not especially good at receiving gifts (feel awkward), or at receiving compliments (feel sheepish). Other people relish receiving gifts and compliments. I really relish doing things for other people (like preparing a meal), spending time together, or a good ol’ fashioned hug. What are the ways you prefer to show your love? Consider all kinds of relationships.

We can also recognize that it is not just about how we ourselves prefer to express our love, but also the penchants of key people in our lives. We learn to appreciate how others are trying to show that they love us. Some people are really keen to anticipate the needs of others, while others are quite content just to hang out on the couch and veg. Both are expressions of love! (Do you have someone in your life who insists on a hug when you would prefer a cookie?!)

So during this season of giving gifts, making food, gatherings of family and friends, mistletoe, and uplifting Christmas Cards - our aim is that we can use this time to see and come to recognize that all of these happenings are expressions of love and they all point to the One Who comes, who is Love Incarnate.

May God fill your heart this season!
Fr. Joel