holy habits 

My Dear Parish Family,

Lent is much more than abstaining from chocolate or not eating meat on Friday. Lent is a season for metanoia - which literally means changing your mind. Not with respect to ice cream flavors but being renewed or made new of mind.  We can also speak of it as a special season of conversion, meaning a turning of glance or focus.

Now if you are anything like my Dad - who takes Lent seriously - you give up similar things each year. My Dad usually gives up smoking, gambling, sweets, and he tries to pray the rosary each day. And for 40 days, his ways change. But throughout the year, those bad habits creep back in. And I am not trying to pick on him. But I think many of us are like that.

For my own part, last year I was engaged in Exodus 90, a 90 day program that had a ton of sacrifices: cold showers, no snooze button, no eating between meals, no sweet treats, no alcohol, daily prayer. And honestly, I felt better living out all those disciplines. They were good for me; but I could not continue the strict regimen.

But Lent is really meant for enduring change, even if less dramatic. By God’s grace, we seek to be “transformed by the renewal of our minds,” more deeply sharing in the new life of Christ, not just gutting out some sacrifices for 40 days. So how can we do that deeper work, that soul work and really form the habits that lead to holiness? We need to engage in the deeper work of habits, putting away vices and growing virtues. Atomic Habits and the Power of Habit have been great tools for me. A wealth of information exists to help make those small incremental changes which lead to lasting change. 

Here are some simple tips that I hope to develop further in the weeks to come: be prayerful; be specific; be humble.

First, be prayerful. God is loving you into being at this very moment. He has a plan for your life, and for your Lent. Quiet your heart and pray. What does God want you to attend to this Lent? It could be a long-held vice (smoking) or a newly acquired one (candy crush, scrolling). The first step is to bend the ear to what God would have you embrace, because the grace needed for that change will be there.

Second, specifics are so significant. “Twenty pushups a day,” is not specific enough. “When I close my laptop for lunch, I will drop to the floor and do 20 pushups.” The details matter to enact real change. We need a very detailed plan. Take the time this week to be specific. If you are giving up snacks, take the time to remove them from your home and routine before Lent begins. If you are removing all the technology from the bedroom (great idea!) then find another place for all the gadgets and cords now. The best way to start a new habit is to link it or chain it to something you already do each day. The best way to uproot a habit is to remove the steps that lead to that behavior.

Third, be humble. Lasting change is hard. Make small incremental changes. Even a 1% change each day over time makes a huge deal in a year. Pray for just 3 minutes, just one decade of the Rosary, and add a bit overtime. Pretty soon, you will be praying the entire Rosary without fail. Part of humility is asking for help, someone who is sharing the effort with you. Call them an accountability partner if you want. They know of your resolve and are present to encourage you. (Another good reason to join a Small Group for Lent!) Another part of humility is being ready to begin again when we falter. Do not let one stumble ruin your Lent or even your day. In humility, ask for forgiveness and the grace to begin again. We must never tire of beginning again.

So much more to share with you! For now, please take some time and make a Lenten game plan. Be prayerful. Be specific. Be humble. Those ingredients will make for a sound beginning.

In his grace,
Fr. Joel